The Good Patrons of 750 Words

5 cups

My journey started in 2018. “Pfft, it will be easy to write for 30 days in a row! I can do 100 days! I can do 1000 days!” These were the starry-eyed thoughts of my deeply wounded and tragically unaware state of being.

It took 8 months to reach that 30 day goal. I learned so much about myself as I struggled to do this one “small” thing. When I reached the goal I felt as it must feel to complete one’s first marathon, flopping to the ground, exhausted and immensely satisfied. I did it! Now I can move on. Thank you 750 words, and goodbye. I felt ready to pursue other goals.

In late 2020, at a low moment of peering around at my life in shambles and wondering how to climb out of this mess I’ve created, I decided to return. The tool helped me before, perhaps it can help me again. And I wrote first thing every morning (this is a not-so-secret key for anyone trying to figure out how to remember to write daily and feeling like an insane crazy person that they’re unable to remember to do something for 30 days). And there were no major epiphanies, no drastic improvements in my life, but I thought hey, at least I am doing this one thing. That must matter.

I noticed it was so much easier to keep my streak this time. Practically effortless. I noticed how much more grounded and stable of a human I am since the last bout. And I eyed potential badges – namely the cheetah and the early bird. I crafted a goal of hitting both at once, write quickly each morning by 9am. That gave me something to focus on and notice my goal-reaching habits. (The way you do one thing is the way you do anything. That is what makes this pursuit profound, to me.) This goal proved elusive, as I would sleep in on occasion, or ponder while writing and kept losing the 10-day streaks required.

Yesterday I hit 30 days, and it wasn’t a celebration like last time, but more of a satisfying “Hah.” TODAY my friends, today I was typing along, I noticed that I started at 8:33 but thought it was enough to make it by 9 without thought, and then I glanced down and noticed it was 8:57 with a few hundred words to go. WHAT I got a boost of adrenaline and decided to go for it. My fingers flew, I closed my eyes and let the typos fly, periods begone (cheetah tips for ya). And I transcended into that flow state where profound wisdom flows, and received beautiful healing insights.

I peeked my eyes open and saw that I had hit 750, and it was 9am. Did I make it in time? I checked the stats – and Early Bird badge shined upon my surprised expression. I had thought I only had maybe a 5 day streak going, and there she was. And I noticed that today is day 31 and it’s my longest streak. That first time I had quit when I reached the goal. This time is different. I don’t know what is unfolding, but I know now there is no escaping this. You can’t quit life. People try yes but, we’re eternal spirits, for better or for worse. There is no way out. Whatever the challenge is, it must be faced one way or another, and you learn the challenges never end. Life is challenging. But really would you have it any other way?